FASHION FRIDAY (WHAT IS YOUR BRAND/STYLE)

Girlfriends, do you know what your brand or style is?  Do you even have a style? I was wandering through a clothing store, waiting for my son.  I won't name the store but the initials are Burlington Coat Factory LOL.  I was originally looking for a suit, however I stumbled upon a cute dress that actually had a crinoline skirt underneath.  I loveeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee the look of the dress and though how beautiful and feminine women use to dress in the 1950's.  I have a confession.  I use to be a huge Doris Day fan, reason being I simply love the clothes she wore in her movies.  I proudly label myself as a girlie girl.  Now I know that is not every one's style but it is mine.  I love clothing that is chic and feminine and most of all comfortable.  When I wear a clothing item it needs to feel as comfortable as my own skin. 

Now I want to just touch on something that is utterly important.  The older we get things change in and on our body.  Chances are if you are in your 30's; 40's 50's and older, gravity has very well taken it's toll on your body.  Throw in pregnancies, those dreaded stretch marks, weight gains, weight loss etc. your breast now has it's own zip code!  Now I'm not saying this to get down on anyone. I am definitely included in this group. My point is we cannot and should not want to wear in our mature age clothes that we would and could wear in our early 20's. 

Having lost a lot of weight gives me the option of being able to shop virtually anywhere except plus size stores, which I have to say I miss my Ashley stewards  stores. Anyway! as a good friend once told me, because they make it in your size doesn't mean you should wear it.  At the tender not so young age of 47, I'm not trying to look like or wear the clothing of a 20 year old.  I'm not saying I need to look like a candidate for the Shadybrook Farms Retirement Home, but I'm not trying to look like a Hanna Montana fan either.

So what I've figured out about my Style or Brand is I love to look chic and classy with a dash of trendy with a schmere of classic mixed with a dollop of new.  LOL (sounds more like a recipe doesn't it)

When I walk out of my house I feel good and I own my look and that my dear sister friends is a GREAT feeling.

If you haven't figured it out, I challenge you to find or develop your style/brand.  It's not to late.





Hugs and Blessings, Diva Val

WELLNESS WEDNESDAY (EXERCISE IS OUR FRIEND)

Good Wednesday my lovely sista friends, I just want to share a few words of encouragement about exercise; But before I begin let me give the disclaimer, I am not a Doctor, an exercise guru or a personal trainer.  I am, however, a woman who has battle the better part of my adult life with weight.  As I stated in a previous blog I chose to have gastric bypass surgery.  Now I have heard folks say doing so is cheating.  Cheating what death? Then cheat I did.  Having surgery was not nor will it ever be a magic pill.  Just like the contestants on the show Biggest Losers or some of the very well known weight loss programs, We (bariatric surgery patients) have to work to maintain our weight loss.  Now I wish I could tell you how much I simply live to exercise but that would be the biggest lie known to man! lol I don't mind however exercising for the simple fact that I enjoy where I am health wise and want to maintain my good health. 


I am a HUGE fan of the show Biggest Losers, this year the theme is eliminate excuses.  Well I challenge you to eliminate the excuses.  There are a variety of things people can do to get fit and healthy.  The NUMBER ONE thing a person can do that is absolutely free is WALK.  Walking is a fabulous way to loose and maintain weight loss.  Find a school track, or a walking trail to just walk.  If you live in a community that provides free gym access then GO. It amazes me how people whine and complain about not having enough time to work out, but spend hours on end, talking on the phone, watching tv or surfing the web.  Studies show that just 30 minutes a day of brisk walking can make a difference in your overall health. 


Spring has seemingly arrived early, this is a great time to get on track by walking or incorporating any type of exercise regimen.  We all want to look good and feel good this summer, but we don't want it to be temporary.  I don't know about you but I intend to be fit, lovely and active for a very long time.
Why don't you challenge yourself and join me by moving your body in exercise.


Come on ladies MOVE YOUR BODIES!  I know we can do this.



Hugs, and Blessings, Val

WHAT'S YOUR STORY?

I was channel surfing and came across the opening for a christian show that was coming on.  It really captured my attention. Words would flash across the screen. The question was asked if we believed and knew when Christ would return what would we do differently, who would we talk to, who would we help?  That got me to thinking about my life story.  It also got me to think about a sermon I once heard.  The speaker's topic was about the dash in between the date of birth and the date of a person's passing.  The speaker stated that dash represents everything in life that took place from birth until the end of one's life, now I don't want you to get all upset and think OMG she's being morbid.  I know people get very uncomfortable about the topic of death. This my dear friends is not about death, this is about life!  Let me ask you, if someone were to write about your life, and or make a movie about your life, what would it be about?  What would you want the book to say or not say?  Would you be pleased with the story?  Would you want parts or all of your life re-written?  Now you might be thinking Val what's your point?  No ONE can write your story better than You!  Any great writer knows that in order to get to the end of a great story it may have to be re-written several times.  Be honest with yourself would you be pleased right here and now if you wrote your story.  Well I challenge you to write your story, and if you find your are not please start writing the sequel. The Part II of your story.  This is what my blog is all about.  It's about the Sequel or the Second Part to a very interesting story.  I personally feel the beautiful Angela Bassett would be the best person to play me in a movie, LOL just kidding. 

I recently had a conversation with a lovely and wise woman, Ms. Tina Hines of FOR MY SISTER FRIENDS,  http://www.formysisterfriends.org/  I explained that I sometimes feel like I'm all over the place with my ideas and plans concerning business.  Tina asked me was I the same person at the age of 20 that I was at the age of 16, and of course I said no I was not I had changed.  She then stated "why would you not expect your ideas and plans to change".  She was right of course, change is inevitable. The beauty of life is we can choose to sit on the sidelines and watch or we can become an active part of life.  The fact that we are still  here among the living to tell our story whether you acknowledge it or not is a blessing.  The bigger blessing however, is not only to tell the story but to live it.

I love to write, so I certainly know the first thing I put to paper is not always what I end up with as a finish product.  That being the case, it doesn't discourage me from continuing to write.  Now at this stage of my life I am proudly revising my story and it's fabulous! I would be lying if I said each and every chapter is about happiness, and flowers, and running threw a field of lilies toward a tall fine hunky Man who sweeps me up in his arms and carries me away. Wait isn't that a butter commercial? LOL anywho, a great story has highs and lows; funny parts and sad parts; A great story may have a little mystery in it or some sweet poignant parts to it.

So today my lovely friends I challenge you to revise your story.  Make your story what you want it to be it's not to late!  Would your story put folks to sleep?  Then it's time to spice things up for the revision.

Get up stop sitting around whining and complaining it's time to live your new story!

WELCOME TO FASHION FRIDAY (Beauty Begins Within)

I began the journey of writing this blog to not only keep my mind sharp and fresh but to share my journey in the hopes of encouraging others.  Begining a blog in and of itself is an interesting journey  and I am enjoying every minute of it.  It is however, my desire to encourage women to have balance as we grow in years.  As we grow older and wiser we recognize many things will change some way beyond our control.  That being said, we don't have to sit on the sidelines helplessly.  We can do things to make sure we live a happy, balance, peaceful, successful life.  To get this segment started I've invited my very good friend Calandra the Author of THIS AND THAT WITH CALANDRA to share some of her Fashionista wisdom with us. 

Read and enjoy!

Beauty is NOT Only Skin Deep by: Calandra Branch

 “We wear the mask that grins and lies. It hides our cheeks and shades our eyes.” – Paul Lawrence Dunbar

When Valerie asked me to write this blog post, so many ideas flooded my head – I thought of all the makeup applications I had done, videos, FOTD (Face of the Day) posts on my blog, etc. But as she launches her new series of health and wellness posts, I thought it would be more appropriate to start with the basics. A bare face…clean slate…a blank page. THIS is where the rubber hits the road.

At a recent mini-makeup party my best friend and I hosted, I started the event by saying, “If you don’t feel comfortable in your own skin, WITHOUT makeup, then you should leave right now because this party isn’t for you.” Of course I was being dramatic, but my central thought was sincere. True beauty comes from WITHIN. The most beautiful makeup will do nothing for an ugly personality. Now, can makeup help you feel better about your appearance? Absolutely!! I attended a formal function several months ago and rocked my first real black smoky eye. And yes, I looked in the mirror, grinned from ear to ear and said, “Girl you betta WORK!”

Ladies, don’t fall for the makeup okie doke. Don’t get me wrong…I love a good “beat” face like the next woman But what I love more is seeing healthy, naturally sun-kissed skin radiating a glow of self-confidence and self-love, whether bare-faced or with a ‘pop’ of color! Be beautiful…be healthy…be YOU!

 http://calandrabranch.wordpress.com/

WELCOME TO FASHION FRIDAY (Beauty Begins Within)

I began the journey of writing this blog to not only keep my mind sharp and fresh but to share my journey in the hopes of encouraging others. Begining a blog in and of itself is an interesting journey and I am enjoying every minute of it. It is however, my desire to encourage women to have balance as we grow in years. As we grow older and wiser we recognize many things will change some way beyond our control. That being said, we don't have to sit on the sidelines helplessly. We can do things to make sure we live a happy, balance, peaceful, successful life. To get this segment started I've invited my very good friend Calandra the Author of THIS AND THAT WITH CALANDRA to share some of her Fashionista wisdom with us.

Read and enjoy!

Beauty is NOT Only Skin Deep by: Calandra Branch

“We wear the mask that grins and lies. It hides our cheeks and shades our eyes.” – Paul Lawrence Dunbar

When Valerie asked me to write this blog post, so many ideas flooded my head – I thought of all the makeup applications I had done, videos, FOTD (Face of the Day) posts on my blog, etc. But as she launches her new series of health and wellness posts, I thought it would be more appropriate to start with the basics. A bare face…clean slate…a blank page. THIS is where the rubber hits the road.

At a recent mini-makeup party my best friend and I hosted, I started the event by saying, “If you don’t feel comfortable in your own skin, WITHOUT makeup, then you should leave right now because this party isn’t for you.” Of course I was being dramatic, but my central thought was sincere. True beauty comes from WITHIN. The most beautiful makeup will do nothing for an ugly personality. Now, can makeup help you feel better about your appearance? Absolutely!! I attended a formal function several months ago and rocked my first real black smoky eye. And yes, I looked in the mirror, grinned from ear to ear and said, “Girl you betta WORK!”

Ladies, don’t fall for the makeup okie doke. Don’t get me wrong…I love a good “beat” face like the next woman But what I love more is seeing healthy, naturally sun-kissed skin radiating a glow of self-confidence and self-love, whether bare-faced or with a ‘pop’ of color! Be beautiful…be healthy…be YOU!

http://calandrabranch.wordpress.com/

Welcome to WELLNESS WEDNESDAY (It's My Anniversary)

Ladies, I'd like to share something very near and dear to me.  On March 17th I celebrated 4 years out from bariatric surgery.  I made the decision after careful consideration, personal research regarding the pros and cons and much prayer.  What prompted me to even consider the surgery was loosing my only sister to a massive heart attack in 2000.  She passed exactly one month before her 41st birthday. To say that my family was devastated would be an understatement. One of the last conversations we had was her concern for my health.  It wasn't because I was sick, but neither was she.  I was, however, morbidly obese.  My sister did have a chemical imbalance that cause her cholesterol level to be extremely high.  It was comical to see people's response when she would introduce me as her little sister as I was twice her size. Family history aside, I made the decision some 8 years later to save my own life. What I mean is I was unhappy with the way I felt and looked.  I could no longer hide in my house and under layers of clothes hoping the world wouldn't see me.  I had to stop playing the victim and being selfish. That's right I said being selfish.  When you fail to deal in reality about your health and well being, you not only put yourself in jeopardy you put your love one's in jeopardy too. The devastation of loosing someone you love unexpectedly is a hurt and pain that is inexplicable. 

After experiencing and dealing with some very traumatic situations in my life I did what a lot of people do, I medicated myself with food. The results was obesity, depression, shame of allowing myself to get to that place and physical pain i.e. back pain, knee pain etc. 

March 17, 2008 I had gastric bypass surgery.  According to the Nurses I was the poster child for Gastric Bypass.  I didn't have any complications at all and a week or two later I was feeling great! Now I'm not suggesting that anyone overweight run out and have surgery.  This was my decision and my Journey and it was one of the BEST decisions I have made as an adult.

Fast forward Four years and I am feeling FABULOUS, now I will confess that lately I haven't been exercising like I should but that is definitely about to change.  I am so blessed and eternally grateful to my Heavenly Father for allowing me to live through the surgery and to still be here to tell my story.  I share this in the hopes that it will encourage , enlighten and uplift someone. Whatever method you use to be a healthy you is groovy! lol I am proud to tell people I am 47 years young.  I thank the LORD every day, for each new day I see.

My beautiful sisters we come in different shapes and sizes and hues and it's a beautiful thing, let's just make sure we are healthy in our beautiful bodies.

I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful,  I know full well  Psalm 139:14

hugs and blessings, Val

At my heaviest  

Current Day:

ENJOY THE JOURNEY

Last week I had the privilege of going home to NY to visit my family.  I got to spend time with a relative I love like a sister.  We were having a conversation trying to play catch up and share what we have been going through lately.  When I shared with her that I had recently lost my job she said to me, "how do you have so much peace and calm" You see, as I was telling her some of the test and trials I had and was presently going through, I was smiling. I have FINALLY gotten to a place where I can smile in the midst of my trials. Now don't get me wrong I hurt and cry and question why like anyone one else.  What I've finally learned is to ENJOY MY JOURNEY. No matter what's going on in your life;  What's going to happen WILL happen. You can moan and groan your way through life or you can say THANK YOU LORD for another day to be greater than yesterday.  The following weekend I spent with my niece and my great nephew, who is 6 months old. I love spending time with my family. My niece and I went to service at her church. After service, we stopped at a local drug store.  As I was paying for my purchase the cashier complimented me on my nails.  She went on to tell me how after becoming very ill, having surgery and being on medication her nails became soft,weak and broke off.  I said to her "treat yourself". She looked at me like she was having a light bulb moment. She then stated she still has pain at times from her surgery and might get a massage.  I encouraged her to do so, because she deserved it. Now you maybe wondering how I would know she deserves it.  The fact that she got up out of her bed and came into work instead of feeling sorry for herself, to me, meant she deserved a good massage. I wish I had encouraged her to enjoy her journey.

Clearly as individuals, everyone's journey won't be the same. Some journeys will have more twist and turns than others.   Some people have a desire to travel abroad, while others would like to travel too the next State over.  Wherever your journey may lead you, ENJOY YOUR JOURNEY.  If you don't like the road you are traveling on, then change courses. If you were taking a trip and realize your were heading in the wrong direction would you continue on? So if you can't enjoy your journey because negative, stifling, painful situations are going on. It's time to make some changes so you too can enjoy your journey.

For all of you lovely Ladies who ARE enjoying your journey, don't loose that joy.

It is a fabulous feeling, a blessing and a joy to be able to ENJOY YOUR JOURNEY.


Hugs and Blessings, Val

REMEMBER TO BREATHE

I LOVE music, it is a universal language.  Have you ever heard a song in another language and didn't understand the words, but you understood the sentiment?  Whether it was sad like a beautiful
Opera sung in Italian, you may not have understood what the songstress was saying but you felt the pain, the joy, the love, the happiness or the sadness.  One of my favorite Artist is Layla Hathaway the Daughter of the incomparable Donnie Hathaway.  On one of her CD's she has a song called BREATHE, I was listening and I thought yes this is it.  The chorus is. " You gotta believe that this ain't the end of the road, it's all a bad dream until you believe, you gotta know that the story  is still to be told. JUST BREATHE, remember to BREATHE".  The key to living is to continue to breathe. That means in spite of all that's happening to you and around you.  You have to continue to breathe to continue to live. 

Many of us are familiar with the book and then a movie adaptation of Terri McMillian's book waiting to exhale.  So many could relate to the movie because they felt like their lives were in limbo.  Like one very long inhale of breath; Holding, until finally you had to let go of the air that was stagnate. Now the Stagnated air could have been different things for different people. For some it was unhealthy relationships, to others it was holding on to past hurts; and to others, it was being paralyzed by fear.  Whatever it was, it prevented you from moving forward or for the sake of this blog it prevented you from breathing.  Taking in new, clean fresh air.  The beauty in all this, is you remembered to breathe, and you survived.  You didn't think you could, or would at the time but you did!

You are so much stronger than you give yourself credit for.  So if you don't remember to do anything else. REMEMBER to BREATH.

"The story is still to be told"  and it's a fabulous story!